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They weren't kidding when they compared life to a roller coaster. I know my emotions certainly are right now.

Besides everything else, I just feel like I'm in a funk. I feel trapped in routine. I feel like I don't have choices, I just go through the motions. I need to shake things up a bit. I need to regain myself. I can't even begin to go through my emotions and start to heal when everything is aggravating me right now. I need to find new outlets, positive things to get me through the day. Something new. Something different.

I'm trying to get a little exercise in everyday, but I feel weird doing it when everyone is home. I need to focus on having it be the first thing I do when I wake up.

Beyond that, I don't have many ideas. I think I need to get away more often, especially for things that I want to do. Maybe go away for the weekend, go see a play, go visit the little shops in the area, visit a park and hike...something different than what I'm doing now. I need something to look forward to, other than just another day of chores and routines that I'll never get ahead of.

I need to regain who I am rather than just what my job is. When you peel away my roles; wife, mother, caretaker, homemaker, daughter...who am I? That's what I want to find out...