Stress is obviously a factor with my illnesses and boy do I have enough of it right now. I seem to be going through a particularly bad flare up at the moment. With so many people dependent on me it's hard to stop and take care of myself when I need to. There comes a point though, that guilty or not, I have to just stop.
Today was one of those days. Just the simple act of getting out of bed and fixing breakfast (even an easy meal) was enough to burn through my energy and leave me wanting to scream. The worst part, is not being able to do anything about it. I can't just go to sleep. I can't just take pain medication to make it better. I have to be responsible. I have to keep everyone safe and taking a narcotic that's going to slow my reaction time is not an option.
Today was one of the worst days I've had in a long time. So I did the only thing I could think of. I baby proofed my bedroom the best I could, packed enough food and toys to get Meghan and I through the day, and we played in my bedroom. I still couldn't sleep or take medications, but she could play while I watched from the bed. We watched tv, cuddled in bed, ate PB&J (on Daddy's pillow) and just had a general slumber party. Meghan loved it! Finally she was allowed to explore Mama's room!
I honestly don't know why I haven't done it before. Sure I've lied down on the couch, but I'm constantly up every time she leaves my line of vision. This way I was able to confine her to a smaller space where I could constantly see her.
Finally, I did get her to take a decent nap and I was able to sleep as well. I'm not completely better and I'm nervous about my appointment tomorrow, but taking that time helped!
Here's a little clip of Meghan eating lunch in Mama's room during our lazy, pajama day.
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