One Year

It's hard to believe that it's been a whole year since I've seen my sweet boy.
More than a year as I write this. One year ago today, we would have been in a hotel in Jacksonville, enjoying our family vacation to celebrate Max's 2nd birthday. We had tickets to see the Wiggles that Friday. We were going to spend the rest of the weekend at parks, the Zoo, the beach...being lazy in the hotel room. Leading up to this, we had rented the newest Wiggles dvd, Max had already learned the new songs. I was excited to see them too, to spend that time with my son, to watch him dance and sing as he so loved.

Here we are a year later, never having gotten to see the Wiggles. Never seeing him dance and sing again. We haven't watched the Wiggles since the day of his accident. Max was sick that morning. Meghan was still in the multiple nap stage, so Max and I made a pallet on the floor and watched Wiggles until he felt better. I considered canceling the appointment I had for myself that afternoon, but he was feeling a lot better. I left my cell phone in the house and came back in to get it. I got one last hug and kiss, not knowing that the next time I'd see him he'd be gone.

We were lucky to have a few friends help us remember Max this past Friday. We met at a local park that we had not visited before (less memories) and released balloons for Max. My boy who so loved balloons.

It was brutally hot. Max wasn't there. None of our family was there. But we were surrounded by friends, even Max's friends CR and Mason. Our friend, Daphne, read a poem. We all cried. We remembered Max and we released our balloons. It was good...but it was hard and it's just not fair.